My Angel named "Catherine Andrea" (The Pain of Losing a Child)

The 31st of May marks another memorable day in my life! This year, little Catherine Andrea would have turned 3 years old! Looking back, it was, for me one of the most unforgettable event in my life! It was the day my third baby came to this world and left after an extremely short existence of barely two hours, leaving without even having the chance to get to know her daddy & mommy and her sisters as well. Born four months earlier that she should, she was rather very much pre-mature to be able to survive! It was indeed a very difficult situation for me then, having been diagnosed with an incompetent cervix (I was supposed to have "bed rest" for the rest of my pregnancy then) which eventually led to a leak in my "bag-of-water" and to that unfortunate decision to deliver the baby at 5 months. I remember, my husband & I , was even asked to sign a waiver by my doctor stating that we agreed and understood that there is no chance of saving our baby due to severe pre-maturity and under development. Until now, I can still remember how heavy my heart was while I was in the delivery room, all by myself, as they wait for my tummy to contract... I was crying endlessly, not really because of the physical pain I am experiencing that time, more so because of the fact that I am losing my baby and that there seemed to be no other option for me and that there's nothing I can do but to accept my fate! I remember saying "sorry" over and over to my baby and praying to the Lord to help me accept and understand everything I am going through that very moment and for Him to take and receive my baby as she goes back to Him! I was praying for strength to be able to accept His Holy Will! With the unending love and support of family and friends, slowly but surely, I've healed from the pain! The pain of losing a child and learning to surrender to the Will of God! With continued faith in Him and as time passes by, I've learned to accept that, maybe, it was really His plan to take Catherine from us! Maybe, that was her purpose - to be our "little angel" ... forever and ever in the Heavens up above!

To our dearest angel... I know you're happy where you are and I know you're watching us everyday! We miss you and we know, you know how much we do love you!